Have you ever had one of those conversations with yourself that go like this:?
Berater Self: “I am a Lazy. Butt. Just saw SusieQ. I know for a fact she already worked forty hours this week. She handled the Veteran’s day popcorn distribution for the whole school on her day off. She looked like a million bucks, and the more I get to know her, it’s true. She is sincerely nice. Not lazy.”
Gentle Self: “People really enjoy your smile because it comes out of your eyes more than your crooked tooth smile. Not every face can pull that off.”
Angry Self: “I hate traffic. I hate vegetables. I hate luke warm coffee. I hate dirty dishes. I hate kitchen sink scum. I hate mohawks. I hate mullets. I hate Talbots. I hate Dillard’s. I hate malls. I hate shopping. I hate shoppers. I hate people who smile. I hate people who smile while they shop. I hate mall shoppers who smile on the way into Talbots. I hate Talbot loving mall shoppers who smile because they think their sink scum is better than mine.
Wait…think their scum is less than mine is the correct syntax perhaps. I don’t care. I hate them!”
Prayerful self: “Stop it! Listen!
It was your muscle popping loose. Nope. Sit still a little longer. Rewind the song. Nope. Reheat the coffee in a bit.
Rewind the song (Alexi Murdoch, “Song For You”).
And its strange that you cannot find
Any strength to even try
To find a voice to speak your mind…
Feeling Better Self: “Oh the strings in that song. So beautiful. I’m not so alone after all.
I Forgot that I jacked up my playlist. Nice!”